So, for those of you who have tried to use Chantix to quit smoking, you can probably relate...

Everyone I've talked to about this so far has had a similar experience involving a series of really fucked up, very weird dreams.

So, this is the last crazy dream that I remember... after this I stopped taking Chantix and continued smoking:

We were all driving around in downtown Seattle, me and two of my co-workers (the weird part here is that I haven't actually spent time with any of my co-workers outside of work). My lead was driving the car, I was sitting in shotgun, and my good friend from high school (who I also work with) was sitting in back.

My lead pulls up to the curb, and my buddy in back gets out to go into a store. He leaves the car door open while he's doing whatever he needed to do, and in his absence, two street walkers (I think) hop in the back.

They start getting all excited that they have found a couple of guys who work in Redmond, and start making comments like "oh this is so cool, we want to party with you guys!"

My lead and I look at each other and respond with "get the fuck out!!" to these two hookers. They refuse, and then it gets weird...

We attempt to "push" them out of the car, to which they respond by rolling back with their legs spread and their sloppy boxes just BAM right in our faces... I'm not sure where the logic went, but basically we continued trying to push them out by their legs, but our hands kept slipping... basically into their genital area.

All I remember is being really scared about touching them there, like I was going to catch something should my hand "fall" into their nasty, chewed up looking beavers... I also remember feeling distraught, because now these leech ass bitches were in the car, and thwarting our efforts to remove them with their fucking vagina's!

Metaphor for something else going on in my life? Perhaps. Disgusting and crazy? Definitely.

It ended with my buddy coming back to the car, yelling at them, getting in the backseat, and us taking off while they fell out the side door (thanks to some crazy driving on the part of my lead).

Fucking A... you want a nice hallucination while you are sleeping? Take some Chantix.


-link

Labels: adventures in seattle, ass clowns, funny shit